Okay, so the real title is Spirituality, Race, and Gender. But I didn’t get to see much of those.

Mo*Con unofficially started on Thursday when Kelli Dunlap, Chesya Burke, and Alethea Kontis were all descending on the Broaddus household. We had a last minute meeting on Thursday night which consisted of Alethea, Kelli, Chesya, Sara Larson, Jenn Baumgartner, Sally, Ro Griffin, and me. Oh, and Maurice.

Maurice: Polygamy sounds like such a good idea until you have a room full of women yelling at you.

Then I got yelled at for having to leave for my non-date. But I knew I’d be seeing everyone for the next 3 days so I wasn’t too worried about it.

Friday began with Nick Mamatas’ flight being delayed. Finally he was on his way and Kelli, Alethea, Chesya and I went to pick him up. We got yelled at by the rent-a-cop. “No parking. Only active loading and unloading!” I’ll show you unloading, buster…

We finally got Nick and headed back to Maurice’s. I yelled at Maurice for neglecting to mention that A: there was construction and the on ramp to I-465 was closed and B: his left turn signal was out. Then I drove to the hotel to pick up Mark Rainey. Not long after arriving back at Maurice’s, I headed back to the airport, with Mark graciously keeping me company, to pick up Matt Cardin. Drove in circles a few times while Mark went in to look for Matt and finally parked the car. We walked around looking for Matt and finally found him. Then the 3 of us fought rush hour traffic by the airport on a Friday night to get to the church. (With me cursing Maurice’s name the entire way.)

Friday night was awesome! I was a little worried at first because Ro and I were both already dragging and we knew we had another full two days to get through. After we ate dinner, Mark, Alethea, Kelli, and I went geocaching. First we went to a bitty little cemetery and we found that cache right away. Then we tried to find one by Wish Park. Mark and Alethea ended up tramping down into the woods in the dark. Kelli and I were wearing shorts and a skirt, respectively, and flip flops so we weren’t about to go in. Instead we stood on the side of 71st street and managed to gain the attention of a passing police cruiser.

Police: Ladies, what are you doing out here?

Kelli: Treasure hunting.

Me: We’re with the church!

Alethea: *comes out of the woods*

Police: Ma’am, what are you doing?

Alethea: Geocaching…*tries to explain*…the guy in the woods can explain it better.

Mark: *comes out of the woods*

Police: Is that the guy?

Me: *thinking* No, the *other* guy in the woods…

Mark: *explains geocaching*

Police: Oh yeah, I’ve heard of that.

The 4 geocachers: *thinking* Suuuure you have.

Fortunately they let us go and told us it wasn’t safe to be in that area at night. We walked away and then said we should have gotten our picture taken with them. Oh well. Next year.

When we got back to the church, Mother Grove was rocking out. Titus thought they were too loud. MG played late into the night. I ran Matt and Mark back to the hotel and then went home and crashed.

Saturday we had the actual convention with the panels. The only one I really got to see was the Spirituality discussion. Very interesting. Maurice will have the footage up sometime this century. Then I had to go to Kelsey’s wedding for a couple of hours so I missed the editor’s panel. When I got back, the gender discussion was well underway. After that, Mo*Con was officially “over”. I dropped Mark and Matt back to their hotel, then went to pick them up an hour later. Mark got in some more geocaching, including finding the one we were looking for when we got busted by the police.

Kelli, Alethea, Chesya, Nick, and I decided we wanted Starbucks and food so we took off on another adventure. Starbucks went smoothly. Then we went to KenTaco Hut. (KFC, Taco Bell, and Pizza Hut combined.) We pulled up and tried to go inside. Kelli was immediately escorted right back out since it was after 11. (”Someone lock the doors!”) We were told to go through the drive-thru. So we get in line. When we finally get to the speaker, the sign displaying the food is turned off so we can’t read it. Nick gets out and we decide we want the family bucket of chicken. We are then told that they only have 10 pieces of chicken left and that they are grilled. We say fine and pull around. While waiting to get to the window, we spot Wendy’s and decide to abandon the grilled chicken. We pull up to the speaker, fully expecting to be told that they are out of burgers. (Nick: You can get one burger or you can get the 17-inator!) We managed to get food and everyone was happy. Then we went back and ate our food sitting around the kids trampoline.

The After-After Party consisted of Maurice, Chesya, Nick, Alethea, Kelli, Debbie, Jenn and me sitting around talking. I took Nick home around 2:30 and crashed in my bed around 3:30. Then I was up and at the church by 9:30 so Ro and I could cook our famous stuffed French toast breakfast for the masses. It went over quite well, and we got smart and didn’t try to toast the bread before stuffing it. We still just about shorted out the church though.

After donning my chefs hat, I put my chauffeur cap back on and dropped Chesya to the airport. Then I went back to the church and said my good-byes to Nick, Matt, Mark, Gary Braunbeck, and Lucy Snyder. (I said bye to Jason Sizemore before going to the airport. ) I was going to say my good-byes to Kelli and Alethea there as well but Kelli demanded I come over that night. So I went home, slept for two hours, went to Father’s day dinner with my family, then went back to Maurice’s.

When I arrived, I was told that I had to make yet another airport run. Nick and Matt had been stuck at the airport all that time and their flight was eventually canceled. So Maurice, Kelli, Alethea, Jenn and I went to pick them up. Thus began Mo*Con III.2. After this point, I cannot discuss much of what went on. It is off the record. I will say that I didn’t get much sleep (and by much I mean less than 2 hours sleeping on the living room floor) and that I was (once again) cursing Maurice’s name at work the next day. But it was worth it.

So that is my very brief report of Mo*Con. My words don’t do it justice. Here are the attempts of some friends:

Maurice

Alethea

Kelli

And Kelli again

Mark (note his shout out to me, the talented and beautiful assistant )

Matt

Jason

Sara

Bob

Shout out to IHW: You guys were such a huge help! The food was awesome! Sara, Ro and I are coming over soon!

Shout out to Matt: Thanks for being such a good sport about everything!

Shout out to Mark: Thanks for taking us geocaching! I can’t wait to go again!

Shout out to Alethea, Kelli, and Chesya: I love having you ladies to gang up on Maurice with! I’m sure Sally, Jenn, and Ro agree.

Shout out to Nick: You’re a sweetie. Don’t worry, I won’t tell.

Shout out to Jason: I’m so glad I got to see you again!

If I’m forgetting anyone, I’m sorry! I met so many wonderful people and made so many wonderful memories that that (coupled with a lack of sleep) has my brain twisted around in confusion. But I love you all and I can’t wait for next year! Hopefully Wrath, Brian, Simon, the Franks and the Hays will be able to grace us with their presence.